I can’t tell you who I am let alone who I’ll be. I can tell you that I worry I won’t grow up to be someone I’m proud of.
I wonder how much of this meticulous pruning and careful watch of who I am is really necessary. On one hand at this point (yes I realise I’m only 15) how can I tell what is me vs. what I pretend is me.* On the other hand, perhaps I really am improving myself.
“If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. But if we confess our sins to Him, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. If we claim we have not sinned we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts.” – 1 John 1:8-10 (NLT)
Full of sin, but cleansed. Full of obvious and hidden imperfections, but fearfully and wonderfully made. How can I be both?
In this case (as usual) I prefer the NLT version.
“Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvellous—how well I know it.” – Psalm 139:14 (NLT)
Complex. Fearfully and wonderfully complex. I am both. No denying the fact that I have a lot to work through. No denying the fact that He loves me anyway.
I feel like knowing this should make becoming (or remaining) me easier. I need to know “full well” and appreciate this fact before anything can become “easier”.
The Creator of the world loves me bruises, wounds, scars and all. Any change I make should be positive and for me or for Him. Not because my Facebook is dull or because my life isn’t Pinterest (or Tumblr….not that I have one…) worthy.
“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” – E.E Cummings
I can’t tell you who I am let alone who I’ll be. I can tell you that I will do my best to be someone I’m proud of today.
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*I have no idea if that is proper English or how exactly one would say that in proper English; hopefully you still understood :)